Recently my daughter and I spent the afternoon thrift shopping. I've come to realize thrifting is my own warped sense of gambling... "What kind of vintagey cool unique thing may I stumble upon today?" For her it is an afternoon of developing her style. I believe in a style, not a fad or name-brand. The current style her 7 year old self is cultivating resulted in an abundance of cheetah print.
As we walked to the last store, we heard the commotion before we saw it. There was a young man, probably in his 20's screaming a profanity laden tirade as he and his pregnant female companion walked down the main street in our small town. My daughter cowered into my side, gripping my hand tightly asking "What is he screaming about Mommy?" I answered that I was unsure, and she asked, "Is it drugs Mom? Is that why he is acting that way?"
My life experiences have taught me that the young man was either suffering from the effects of alcohol, drugs and/or mental illness and my heart broke a little for him and his female companion that was obviously trying to make "everything better" as she chased after him to desperately cling to his arm.
As the local officers arrived to calm the man, my daughter stood peering out the window, intently taking in the scene. The officers, the young man sitting on the sidewalk, and the upset female were knitted together in a disjointed web of society on the corner of the street in the late afternoon sun.
Several times over the next few hours, my daughter said abruptly, "That was scarey Mom."
I finally had the foresight to ask, "What would you do if your boyfriend screamed like that?" "I would run Mom. I would run and call the policeman, or just run away."
Oh baby girl... I pray you still feel this way when you are 16, or 24 or 33.
I pray that you listen to that gut voice that screams RUN when your heart is saying "But I LOVE HIM."
I pray that you know the difference between supporting someone who is struggling and trying to fix him.
I pray that if you ever feel scared by the way someone is treating you, that you run. Run to a girlfriend, or your brothers or to your Daddy and me.
I pray that you understand being alone is more fulfilling than being in a toxic relationship.
And I pray that you never ever lose your fantastic sense of style to the pull of a passing fad.